Let me first say this: upon hearing this story, my immediate reactions were utter shock mixed with some laughter. Let's take this out of context for just a minute to really put some perspective on the situation. Picture this in your mind...it will be more fun that way. Let's surmise you're coming home from a vacation, business trip, whatever the case may be. You checked your bag, so you make your way over to pick it up. The conveyors begin to move and the first few bags come into view. A few more go by, and then you see it...the bag that seems to have an erection. At this point, the search for your own bag has come to a screeching halt. You no longer care about retrieving your own belongings because somebody else's has a big rubber dick on it! Now if you can tell me honestly, with no warning of what was to come, that you would be able to refrain from laughing, I would still say you're full of it. I know I'd be just about doubled over in laughter. I mean, come on...any sudden movement that bag makes will cause that thing to flop around like a tube of jello. You'd be just as guilty as any of the other people at luggage claim that found it to be funny. Imagine the horrified looks on old peoples' faces, the parents that quickly cover their childrens' eyes and the people who are just waiting for the person that actually has to pick it up and claim it.
Either she just saw the bag, or she needs a fresh pair of Depends...or both.
Funny as all of that may be, the point is it actually happened. Two men had to experience public mockery, ridicule and embarrassment because of some idiot(s). That's not fair, no matter what the sexual orientation. As far as that goes, let me present my stance on homosexuality so that we're perfectly clear. I am not gay. I certainly don't have a problem with anyone that is gay, though. Who am I to meddle in their sexual preference? My rationality is simple: with each gay male, that's one fewer guy I see as competition in the dating world. They're increasing my odds. That logic is flawless and you know it.
As for the event that took place, a couple of interesting questions surface. How many times have you checked your bag and found things either missing, misplaced or even added? What do I mean 'added'? One of the aforementioned coworkers told me she found a note including an email address from someone upon returning from her honeymoon. Some bold bastard was checking her out and decided he should let her know about it. In a very creepy fashion, he slips the note in there and hopes for an email in return. In my opinion, her husband, a proud member of our military, should have opened up a good old-fashioned high-quality American can of whoop-ass on this clown, but maybe that's just me. Seriously though, now that the airports have individuals that go through your bags to make sure you're not carrying out a jihad with explosives in there, how frequently do you think some of these people are actually stealing things from you? Well, they've made it crystal clear that if they're willing to leave suggestive notes and tape one of your unmentionable private belongings to the outside of your bag, they're definitely capable of doing exactly that. I know from now on, my valuables will always be in my carry-on luggage to avoid that possibility. They know that you'll second-guess yourself, thinking, "maybe I left it in the hotel room," or wherever you ended up staying. That second-guessing won't even be a factor until you go home and find out that said object is missing in the first place. By then, you're probably at the point where you don't even want to deal with the hassle of trying to get it back, and they get away with it. I won't even give them that opportunity anymore.
"Dude, you don't have any good shit in here. What a waste!"
This leads me to my next question. Surely people have taken the time to report something missing, and it's probably not a very rare occurrence. So where are the cameras honing in on these miserable low-lives that actually do steal from peoples' bags? You're telling me that through all of the x-rays, screenings, metal detectors and eight forms of ID that need to be shown in order to get on the damn plane, nobody is watching the degenerate that just pocketed a piece of your jewelry while he pretends to search for bombs? The airline said they conducted a full investigation and found nothing substantial to support the accusation made by these innocent men. Let's break this down for a minute. The guy opens the bag, sees men's clothing and a dildo and thinks it would be funny to make this a public event. He grabs the object, finds some tape, secures this thing standing upright on the bag, and then proceeds to cover it in some foul-smelling substance just to add insult to injury, so to speak. This is not exactly a fifteen-second process we're talking about here, yet there were no cameras on him, nor did anyone notice what this guy was doing? Come on. That's pretty tough to believe, don't you think? I'm wondering if the airline found out who it was, quietly fired the individual(s) already, and pretended like nothing ever happened in order to avoid a huge lawsuit. Then suddenly you'll hear about an 'increase in surveillance' of their employees, as if they thought all on their own that it would be a good idea. I hope the lawsuit ends in the favor of these two men, and they get every dime they're suing for. The sad truth is that your belongings are far from private when these people get away with what they're doing.
This guy seems to be enjoying his job way more than he should.
I know I stated earlier that I laughed when I first heard the story, and that I acknowledge that I would have laughed if I saw that happen in person. After reading into the story, you have to sympathize with these guys. Whether you find homosexuality to be a sin or not, nobody deserves to be publicly humiliated like that. United Continental and their employees that carried this act out should be ashamed. Pretty safe to say I won't even consider flying through them again. I don't know what sort of underwear sniffing, shirt stealing cretin they've employed to root around in my bag, so I'm not taking that chance.
Here's the full story.
To Christopher and Martin, I wish you the best. Oh, and thanks for helping my odds with women!
D.
Experiencing public mockery is disgusting! I remember a gay case on the airport, they even filed a case against the airline company for displaying their sex toys in public!
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